fourthwriter’s block

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2009– Bagong taon nang malaman kong buntis ako, sh*t magiging Ina na ‘ko.. ang ganda ng pasok ng taon naisip ko ang dami ko pala dapat ipagpasalamat hindi lang dahil buntis na ‘ko kundi dahil ang ganda talaga ng buhay, it’s still worth living kahit panahon ng recession.We still have every reason to smile each day …

Libre pa naman ang hangin…
Nakakatawa pa rin naman si Jose
May You Tube…
Friendster…
May jowa ka pa…
or
Break na kayo sa wakas ng high maintenance mong girlfriend na pasosyal…
Ikakasal ka na rin sa wakas after mong magmenopause…
May free text parin…
May balik taya sa lotto…
May nagtatanong sa friendster mo kung ano’ng number mo…
Affordable parin naman ang Lucky Me pansit canton…
May pirated dvds…
May pirated tshirts ni Francis M. …
May bagong movie ulit si Sharon…
Malapit na naman ang a-kinse…
Nanalo na naman si Pacquiao…
Nag-asawa na si Ula…
Masarap parin matulog ‘pag umuulan…
Feeling mo blooming ka kahit buntis,… feeling mo lang day!
Ayan organized na ang aparador mo,guluhin mo bukas para busy ka ulit…
Nabili mo na sa wakas ang sapatos na pinag-ipunan mo ng 3 buwan…
At sale na pala ang sapatos na ýon kinabukasan …
Uyyy, nakapag-move on ka na after 10 years, congrats!
Nabawasan na ang timbang mo… ‘wag kang mag-alala hindi obvious…
Makakagising ka na ulit ng late dahil wala ka ng trabaho …
Ayos, ‘di ko alam pa’no tapusin ‘to, ikaw, naman…

Nani–My niece, my migraine, my joy…

Siyam na buwan na rin nang umalis ako… pinuntahan ko sýa sa school nila para mag-paalam.
Wala sýang imik nu’n, nkatingin lang sýa sa ‘kin, nagtataka kung bakit ako umiiyak.
Bakit nga ba umiiyak si mamu…(ganito ýon nani…)
Kase hindi ko na makikita ang muta at bakas ng tulong laway mo sa umaga,
Kase hindi na kita masasaway ‘pag nag-thumbsuck ka ng madumi ang kamay,
Kase hindi na kita mababantayan ‘pag nagmamadali kang bumaba sa hagdan,
Kase hindi na kita makakasama sa tindahan para bumili ng 3-in-1 coffee at lucky me batchoy,
Kase hindi na kita mabibigyan ng “surprise” pag-uwi ko galing palengke,
Kase hindi na kita makakasama sa 7-eleven para mag-slurpee,
Kase hindi na kita makakatabing matulog ‘pag wala ang papa mo,
Kase hindi na kita matuturuan gumawa ng assignments,
Kase hindi na kita makikiss habang natutulog,
Kase hindi ko na mababantayan ang paglaki mo…
Kase may sariling buhay na si mamu…

ang lungkot, napanaginipan ko kaninang patay na ‘ko.bangungot daw ang kinamatay ko.bumangon ako na may dalawang aso na nakabantay sa ‘kin.hindi ako pansin ng mga aso binubulas ko sila pero ‘di nila ako madinig.lumakad ako sa madilim na daan naghahanap ng kakilala.habang daan may mga nagfa-flashback sa utak ko pero ‘di ko naman kilala ang mga taong ýon.sumisigaw ako ng walang nakakarinig, maraming taong nakapila pero lahat sila patay na rin.hindi ako sumunod sa pila nila at umiba ng daan.iyak ako ng iyak lungkot na lungkot dahil marami pa akong gustong gawin at marami pa akong taong ‘di pa dapat iwan pero wala akong magawa kundi umiyak at sumigaw ng ako lang ang nakakarinig.ang lungkot pala ng mag-isa.noon madalas kong isipin kung pa’no ang pakiramdam ng mga namamatay kung ganun na lang ba ýon, kung malungkot ba ang mamatay o kung mararamdaman mo pa ba ýung lungkot na ýon…ngayon alam ko na.

In response to Mr.Chip Tsao’s calling us –NATION OF SERVANTS… here’s what I have to say…
Kung ang Pilipinas ay tatawaging bayan ng Abogado o Doktor, malamang wlang pagtatalunan.Kung anak ako ng katulong at nagtatrabaho ang Nanay ko s Hongkong para makapasok ako s kolehiyo, hindi ko ikakahiyang sabihin n alipin ang Ina ko. Kung iyon man ang tingin nila s Pilipinas, wla iyong pinagkaiba kung tawagin man ntin ang China bilang bayan ng mamamatay sanggol.Aminin n ntin, mas maraming OFWs ang ngtatrabaho bilang alipin s ibang bansa, at sila ang nag-aakyat ng pera s Pinas. Ngayon, kung tambay k lng at wlang ginawa kundi magreklamo, mas dapat kng mahiya at ikahiya.

Hmmm… maniniwala ba kayo na nakausap ko si Ms. Eula Valdes? Kung panó at saan, sikretong malupet! Éto na ýun…

ME: You just made my day, now I know that it really pays to try.Thank you for putting another check mark on my dream list. Should you find certain questions offensive, please leave it blank and accept my apology.Game na…
Do you still watch the Kapamilya channel?I seldom watch local shows.AXN,Star movies,History channel and biography channels are my faves.Sorry

If you could grab someone’s role (movie or teleserye) whose role would you want to portray?I would have loved to play the role of Amy Austria as Bubbles in “Bubbls ativan Gang”, Ate Vi’s “Tagos ng Dugo”, Hillary Swank’s “Boy’s don’t Cry”, Milla Jovovich’s “Resident Evil” for the stunts hehe

What’s the most stupid question have you ever answered? Gee, I don’t remember

People would be surprised to know that you are:Very child like, believe dragons existed, collect medieval swords (replicas only can’t afford the real deal), wanted to be a ninja

What do you consider the song of your life?Gee, never really thought of that…well let me see..when i found out some 30yrs ago that “Moonlight Serenade” was my parents fave song, it became mine too..well among other things..I like The Cure’s LOVE SONG, Van Halen’s WHEN IT’S LOVE

If you were given the chance to know a secret, whose and what secret could it be?I would like to know the lost years of Jesus Christ

If you could invent a thing,what would it be?A Machine that could convert human fats as a source of energy = electricity..a gadget is attached to the human body,when we exercise it produces heat which is energy that can be converted to electricity..ergo we eat and not get fat!!! imagine watching t.v.then electricity fluctuates?Gotta have ice cream!

If money’s no object, what would you buy for yourself?Buy? I want a really nice comfortable house up on top of a mountain and a beach house in palawan

Have you ever felt underrated?A lot of times

Can you honestly say that these stars with titles are better actresses than you?If you’re a star, it doesn’t follow that you’re an actress

We believe that you deserved a title, if you were to give yourself one, what would it be?The UNEXPLORED STAR

Any insecurities?yup, i want to be 2 inches taller, my nose to be a little finer, have thicker hair

What local brands of toiletries do you use? green cross rubbing alchol

And your deo’starts with letter…secret!

Favorite perfume?OP, escada for men

Shoe size?7.5

Waist line?25

If there’s a question you want an interviewer to ask you, what would it be and what would be your response to that?Do you want to be a man? Yes!

If Boy Abunda has his Imaginary Mirror, I have my IMAGINARY MOBILE and Eula is calling you anong sasabihin mo sa kanýa?Hello!

A-Z of your life: (Ok this is optional bahala ka na sagutin o hindi mejo nahihiya na ‘ko skip mo na lang ibang letters na wala kang maisip isagot)
Artist
Bugoy
Carinosa
Daring
Eingelbert Humperdink eng eng

Feisty
Good }

Hearted}
Ingot
Joker
Kulang kulang

Lover
Mother,Miguel
Nanay
Ogag
Praning
Q-te
Richard
Sunget
T
Unggoy
Vampire
Witch
Xcellent
Yana
Zaturrnah!

Special thanks to Karen for making this possible I owe you one!

Nung isang arw,… kumain ako s mackys ng tapsilog… dun ako kumakain mnsan ‘pag alm kong wla na akong aabutan n pagkain s bahay … mahal n extra rice dose na, syempre magtataas sila ng presyo para "in" kuwari apektado sa pagtaas ng bigas (cge n nga) pagkatapos kong matinga s kinain ko, edi nagkaproblema n nmn ako s loob loob ko sna libre mn lng toothpick nila kung wlang floss (wow sosyal)…

naunang mtapos kumain ýung isang mama n dati ko n rin nkikita dun, chopsuey ata inorder nya… (basta gulay ýun) lumapit ýung matandang mamang pulubi at kinain ang tira nýa… naawa nmn ako sa matanda kaya sbi ko s tindera bigyan ng silog ung matanda (silog lng censya na wla n kc akong pera)… edi binigyan nmn…

ngaun éto n c lolo lumapit na… binibigay s kin ung itlog at may sugat daw sha, malansa dw itlog at bawal s kanya.

ayun nagtyaga sya s tira ng mama… kamusta nmn un?

d p ako inaantok kso wla n ko makausap… naubusan nrin me ng maicp n ibrowse… nkausap ko c batang mejas knina s multiply… dati ko n sha kilala pro d kmi ngkaro’n ng chance n mgkausap khit magkatanguan… ok nmn pla sha akala ko lng snob… prang ako rin –aloof.

naicp ko lng …

ilan kya nagiicp syo ng gnun ka khit hndi ka ganun…

cno cno kya un…

ano kya ang tingin nila syo…

at kung bkit ko naicp ang mga bagay n ‘to s dis oras ng gabi…

at pakialam ko ba…

mlamang epekto lng ‘to ng coke…

at greenwich overloaded na bitin.

MAINGAY ANG COMPUTER SHOP, KARAMIHAN AY MGA STUDYANTEMNG NAG CUT NG KLASE,KUNG HINDI NAGLALARO O NAGLALANDIAN, FRIENDSTER ANG INAATUPAG, HABANG WALANG PAKIALAM NA NAGTATYPE LANG SI IZA NG CV.PAGKATAPOS MAG TYPE AY LALAPIT SA BABAENG ASSISTANT DUN PARA MAGPAPRINT.

                     GIRL ASSISTANT:

                     IKAW NA NAMAN? ILANG KOPYA?

                      IZA:

                      LIMA!

PAGKABAYAD NG PINAPRINT AY TATALIKOD NA SI IZA. MAGNGINGITIAN NAMAN ANG ASSISTANT AT ANG CASHIER.

                      GIRL ASSISTANT:

                      ALAM MO BA, 48 YEARS NA YAN NAGPAPAPRINT NG

                      BIO DATA NYA …

HIHINTO SI IZA, BABALIKAN ANG DALAWA AT HAHARAPIN ANG ASSISTANT.   

                     IZA:

                     ILANG TAON KA NA DITO?

                     ASSISTANT:

                      TATLO BAKET?

                      IZA:

                      TATLONG TAON KA NA DITO PERO HANGGANG NGAYON

                      HNDI KA PARIN NAKAKABILI NG DEODORANT MO!

BIGLANG TATAHIMIK ANG PALIGID…MAGTITINGINAN ANG MGA TAO SA ASSISTANT AT LALABAS NG COMP. SHOP SI IZA

Out of 12,707 views na nkuha ng video sa kasal namin (sakal, sakali,saklolo) sa you tube, may isang taong nagcomment … ang sbi n’ya "WHO THE FUCKING WEDDING IS THIS? THIS ISN’T THE MOVIE!" Hala gulat nmn ako dun! Syempre relax lng ako, inenglish ako ha tarantadong ‘yon akala yata porke nasa US s’ya mas  superior na s’ya. Natural ‘di ko inapprove ‘yung comment, pero hinding hindi ko naman papalampasin ‘yung kagaspangan ng ugali n’ya so nagreply ako sa mukang paa na ‘yun,’di ko na babanggitin kung sino kasi sayang ang space. At ‘eto ang sinabi ko:

sorry to disappoint u sir but my apology was clearly stated in the video’s description for using the title sakal sakali saklolo.i’m afraid i didn’t take much of ur time watching that video did i? you’re in you tube, you must be aware that most videos there are from video enthusiasts like you–being april boy regino in that song ‘di ko kayang tanggapin.. but to be honest… katanggap tanggap nmn po.GOD BLESS YOU

Sa isang banda,dapat ko ring maintindihan na ‘di ko hawak ang opinyon o sasabihin ng ibang tao, ako na rin ang nagsabi na nasa you tube s’ya, so dapat open din ako s mga ganung komento kahit pa bastos. So ano ba’ng inerereklamo ko? PINOY kasi s’ya, nakakaasar lang tanggapin na kalahi mo pa mismo ang magbibitaw ng ganung salita.Nasa kultura ba ng pinoy ang maging bastos?  Lalo pa’t nasa ibang bansa s’ya.Matatanggap ko pa sana kung sinabi n’ya na lang na hindi man lang ako nagsuklay.

        i accept the fact that i can never…

        be:

• an actress (joke!)
• a director
• a chef
• a child again

        meet:

• julia roberts,adam sandler,pauly shore,julia stiles,jennifer aniston,janeane garofalo and oprah winfrey in person

        but…

        i can still meet:

• ely buendia  (’watched him performed)
• rico blanco   (’got his autograph)
• eula valdez   (’got her autograph)
• kris aquino   
• ricky lee       (’went to his book launch (trip to quiapo)
• lualhati bautista
• bob ong
• jessica zapra  (’caught her malling)    
• francisco colayco
• my soulmate (he’s now my husband)

        and the ff.writers are now in my friendster:

• gina marissa tagasa
• rj nuevas
• liana sky (no,i will never tell that she’s leah anna marquez shh!)

      i am/ i can / i will

• i am still a tutor
• a friend
• a daughter
• a sister
• a listener
• his wife/girlfriend and txtmate
• i can still be a mother
• i can still be a photographer
• i can still be a painter
• i can still be a layout/graphic artist
• and will still be a writer with or with out –by line

        i can still learn/do the ff:

• change my surname (now mrs. belarmino)
• grow a tree
• write in alibata (done)
• be proficient in using computer (i owe it to my husband)
• design a magazine cover
• design a book cover
• design a web page
• design friendster layouts (done)
• download all my favorite songs (see/hear my playlist)
• collect dvds of my favorite movies (i wish!)
• see the end of a rainbow
• write a screenplay (i’ve written 2,but i’ll have to kill you first before you read them
• write a book or two (wanted publishers!!!)
• swim
• drive
• bear twins
• visit batanes
• visit vigan (been there)
• finish what i’ve started
• cont.this list tomorrow